When we think of February, we think of all the lovely things associated with Valentine’s Day, like flowers, chocolates and romantic dinners. But we know all too well that too many people’s relationships bear little resemblance to a Hallmark movie—especially those relationships that are plagued by violence. 

And it’s not just adults. Teen dating violence is very real, and the numbers reflect a troubling trend. About 12 percent of American high school students are the victims of physical, sexual or psychological abuse at the hands of their romantic partner. 

With numbers like that, it’s no surprise that there’s a month dedicated to this pervasive issue. In 2010, the members of Congress declared February to be Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. An annual awareness campaign was set up, devoted to educating youths on the dangers of dating abuse. It promotes healthy relationships.

Among those disproportionately affected by dating violence are young women, transgender teens and gender-nonconforming youth. And while abuse is often physical, it is also inflicted via social media and texting, and can include everything from bullying to cyberstalking to non-consensual distribution of intimate images. 

This causes intense, long-lasting trauma that not only takes an enormous toll on the health and safety of teens, but also often follows them into adulthood and can significantly increase the risk of future abusive relationships. 

That’s why we in the medical community, along with parents, teachers and other community leaders, need to do everything we can to teach teens about respectful and nonviolent relationships, so teenagers can develop into healthy adults who make their communities healthier and safer as a result. 

Meanwhile, the Biden administration has advanced efforts by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to train educators, families and community members how to teach young people about the benefits of healthy relationships, and how to get away from abusive ones. Those resources can be found at VetoViolence.CDC.gov. President Biden’s Task Force to Address Online Harassment and Abuse is also committed to addressing ways to mitigate the effects of online abuse. 

Other government organizations are doing their part, including the Health Resources & Services Administration (HRSA). In 2017, it began a three-year strategy to address intimate partner violence (IPV), which disproportionately affects those served by HRSA’s programs. 

The 2017-20 strategy, which will be updated this year, focused on four keys to addressing IPV. The public health workforce will be trained at the community and organizational level. Groups will band together to raise awareness of IPV. Access to IPV-informed health care services will be improved for everyone. And finally, gaps in knowledge about IPV risks, impacts and interventions will be addressed. 

At the Wright Center, we are doing everything we can to recognize the signs of teen dating violence, and we depend on everyone in the community to do the same. That vigilance will be key to ensuring your children’s long-term health and happiness. 

And that will let us, as President Biden eloquently said in his recent remarks on the subject, “build a culture where respect is the norm, dignity is the rule, and safety is the expectation—both online and offline. We can measure up to the standards of equality, opportunity, and justice that define our nation at its best.” 

In the meantime, if you know someone in an abusive relationship, immediate and confidential support is available through the National Domestic Violence Hotline’s project. Visit loveisrespect.org, call 866/331-9474 (TTY: 800/787-3224), or text “LOVEIS” to 22522.

Manju Mary Thomas, M.D., is a board-certified pediatrician and medical director of pediatrics, community and school-based medical home services at the Wright Center for Community Health, and is a faculty member for the Wright Center for Graduate Medical Education’s family medicine residency program.