Snarky Newcomer Opines Basely
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When I was growing up, our great worries were iron-poor blood, ineffective laundering and imminent nuclear annihilation. Fortunately Wall Street and our schools had the answer for each: a clever … more
Sometime in the sort-of-recent past (it’s hard for me to keep years straight since moving here to Shangri-La and losing all sense of time), my editor and a fellow columnist were planning on … more
A few decades ago, when we thought computers would improve the world instead of destroy it, a computer scientist was discussing the possibility of a new machine that would automatically give the … more
I am writing this before anything happens that may occur related to an event scheduled for January 20. Rather than forecasting whatever that may be, I am staying within my timeframe and returning the … more
I’m rather tired of the rich and talented. I’m sick of the double Ph.D.s plus M.D.s marrying each other in the Museum of Modern Art they’ve rented for the occasion before … more
I am regularly gobsmacked by being told of things I have said, things which I don’t remember, and some of which I’m pretty sure I didn’t say because I don’t use that … more
Our house is a lot like a body, say, mine.  The older parts have either collapsed or are in the process of doing so, and the newer parts are not new at all. Both are fossilized into a state of … more
Debbie, evoking Henry the VIII, wore a purple furry thigh-length vest over black leggings tucked into ankle booties with high stacked heels, her red hair in short spikes. Behind her desk, the picture … more
The little paper cups filled with samples of fresh peach pie dolloped with ice cream were appearing on the tray too slowly for my taste. The person before me got one and stepped away. Now I was … more
The tragedy When I saw prime rib being sold in the meat department, I was thrilled. Prime rib is rarely seen in groceries because the bulk of it goes to restaurants. Then I noticed the … more
She’s my mom, so of course she’s going to disagree when I say something not usually considered controversial, such as “The sky is blue.”  Mom, shaking head: … more
In spring, an old woman’s fancy doesn’t turn to thoughts of love (I’ve been in love with the same person for 46 years); it just rattles around loosely in her discombobulated brain. … more
Gently tapping, my Aunt Fanny! We were startled awake by a horrible banging that sounded as if our old pipes were exploding simultaneously throughout the house, too loud and close to be the … more
Tommy Ruttlesberry was excited. “They were lined up right over there by Smalltown Inn, you know? Maybe 15 all together carrying I don’t know how many Mexicans—or I don’t know … more
I have done my own research and I have uncovered what may be the most insidious, evil and vicious plot yet from the deep state, the Soros-Biden-Hillary-Pedophile-Steve Jobs-Hugo Chavez’ ghost … more
We weren’t going to bother using the free “Ski at Elk Mountain” PBS donation gift, because I had assumed Elk Mountain was a couple of hours away, like Shawnee or Camelback. I … more
At this time of year, whether you call it Solstice, Hanukkah, Saturnalia, New Year’s, Christmas, Yule or Kwanzaa—among other possibilities—we must ask ourselves again: is Hammacher … more
Is there any scenic, quaint and charming town in any impoverished drug-ravaged county in New York or Pennsylvania that doesn’t cry out for a curated cocktail/housewares store where you can buy … more
At our premarital counseling, the Rev. Butz peered at me and my soon-to-be-husband Mark and said, “You know, not having children is always an option.” We ignored his well meaning … more
Finding meaning through impactful and resilient conversation In today’s world, it’s crucial to engage in impactful and resilient conversation. The art of dialogue should be a … more
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Currently viewing stories posted within the past 2 years.
For all older stories, please use our advanced search.