We all have that one friend who is perfectly trustworthy, but when it comes to certain things, they have burned their credibility. For clarification, this was not intended to be a malicious remark about my buddy, but it’s definitely meant to be a dig following the trial he just put my wife and kids through. 

‘Twas a sunny Saturday morning and we had all awoken at our cabin rental for the weekend and had some coffee, breakfast and more coffee. Don’t worry, not the kids; I had at least one coffee for each child myself. What I failed to anticipate was that I would need an additional coffee for the manchild who was about to punish my kids with his miscalculation. I’m speaking, of course, of my long-time friend and past college roommate Jesse. 

We were on a mission this weekend to have a relaxing outdoorsy excursion and help Jesse create the opportunity to ask his girlfriend to marry him. Exciting stuff. What he decided he wanted to do was propose at the top of a mountain hike where the view would be great for pictures and she would be swooning from the high altitude—ahem, I mean picturesque fall foliage. 

Knowing ahead of time that all of us would be taking this hike, I was very firm in confirming with him that the trail we ultimately chose would be kid-friendly. We were in the Adirondacks, and having summited the Algonquin Trail among others myself before, I knew some of the local peaks could pose a significant challenge to kids and even my wife depending on the weather and terrain. Jesse assured me that he had chosen a trail that had been completed by local Boy Scouts and must be one of the more family-friendly trails in the area. 

Now for the record, this was technically my buddy’s show, so I was not going to give him a lot of cross-examination on his choices. This was largely about him popping the question. Should I have checked the trail stats myself? Yes. Did I? No. 

That being said, after enduring many dirty looks from my wife and carrying my children for short spurts here and there, I can now confidently say two things.

One: My five-year-old and seven-year-old have completed a true Adirondack hike exceeding roughly 3.3 miles in length, an elevation gain of over 1,500 feet with a summit elevation of 2,653 feet. 

Two: Jesse will never again be trusted to choose the family hiking trails.

And in case you were wondering what his girlfriend said when we got to the top, allow me to paint a picture. Nearly to the peak, getting dangerously low on the children’s will to finish, I stopped Jesse to ask him about his plan of attack once we got where we were going. Perhaps it was the hike getting to him, but when asked, he replied with the classic “I don’t know.” I happily offered my assistance with a simple plan, which he promptly agreed to. 

We all reached the top a few minutes later, and before any pictures were taken or any questions were asked, everyone sat down and finished their water and had a few crackers. It would be all downhill back to the cars after this. Jesse was excited to get things moving, so we all got up and started taking some group pictures against the open sky at the top of the peak. 

I was snapping photos on my Canon and asked my wife and the kids to step out of the picture for a moment before exclaiming loudly, “Look, an eagle!” I pointed to the right, which I had hoped would force Jesse’s girlfriend to turn around. Instead, she looked straight at me and claimed there couldn’t be an eagle this high up and that she didn’t hear it.

Never before could I have slapped my forehead any harder in my own mind’s eye. I doubled down on my bluff and managed to get her to turn, although still confidently doubtful about my claim. When she turned back, however, there was Jesse, kneeling with the ring.

The way out here, the most exciting parts of life are often at the top of a mountain. Even if your kids want you to drag them to get there, it’s worth the struggle just to fake an eagle sighting. Even after their caterwauling, my kids came away bragging about what they had done by climbing that mountain. And as for my friend, he came away with a partner to pick better hiking options for kids than he can.