the art of being

Love

By DEBORAH CHANDLER, Ph.D
Posted 2/13/21

There are many ways to think about love.  I like to know love as an inside experience.  This implies that love is innate to who I am.  This inner love bestows an affirming glow of …

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the art of being

Love

Posted

There are many ways to think about love.  I like to know love as an inside experience.  This implies that love is innate to who I am.  This inner love bestows an affirming glow of acceptance and recognition.  This love is free and occurs with being alive.

Different spiritual texts extol this inner state of love.  Avatars of human spirituality have all professed this inner love.  Our leaders of divine possibilities urge us to rely upon this inner state to bring an unconditional acceptance to our lives.  When we are established in this inner love, our own divinity emanates naturally.  We share this inner love with all we encounter.  We experience easefulness and joy.

How can love be innate to who we are?  I’m not sure I really know how this got set-up.  But the cosmos expands with the pulsation of love.  Even in its dramatic and violent history, the underlying dynamic of our universe happens because of the manifestation of virtual particles.  These particles have been popping into and out of existence since this universe began 3.5 billion years ago.  This means we pulsate with the on-going movement of existence coming into being.  This cosmic manifestation gives us the subjective experience of love.

When I wait for someone else to affirm that I am lovable, I get caught in a trap of morose self-doubt.  My inner voice echoes old hurts and slights.  I’m left feeling guilty for not trying harder.

Guilt reduces us to unworthiness.  I think of guilt as my attempt to assert control.  I’d rather believe that I could have created a different outcome if only I had done a better job.  When I think this, I am asserting that I can prevent the unwinding of the universe.  I want to have that control.  But in truth, I am along for the ride.  My whims and needs are of little interest to the unfolding of the cosmos. 

Innate love does not bargain for acceptance.  I impose this conditional acceptance in my mistaken belief that the cosmos is obedient to my fears and desperation.  When I surrender to the unfolding of life, I enter into the realm of love.  My small ego is subsumed into the larger whole.  Without the interference of my small me, I am united with the larger goodness inherent in the cosmos.  I participate in love.

Love requires vigilance.  As I cultivate inner qualities of respect and open-heartedness, I participate in the emergence of love in my life.  I am building an inner lattice of good feeling.  When I trust my subtle interior, I am blessed with love.

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