Actual New York Times  blurb: 

“Pride and Prejudice: Jane Austen classic about five sisters out to nab husbands… the better to produce an heir to save the family farm.”

Coming up this week on New York’s Classics channel:

“Gone with the Wind”

The best Oscar-winning adaptation of Martha Mitchell’s bestseller. The O’Hara family suffers the Oklahoma Dust Bowl, while Rhett Butler, a winning young Henry Fonda, rebels against workers’ conditions.

“The Sound of Music”

Adolf Hitler’s torment by tinnitus speeds the end of World War II. Produced by Oliver Stone, with Clark Gable.

“The Godfather”

Written by Mario Puzo. A family’s times and troubles through the turbulent 20th century, guided by its loving patriarch. The Wayans brothers star.

“Romeo and Juliet”

Starring Clare Danes and Leonardo DiCaprio. With the help of a friendly priest, a young couple elope and rear eight children, all the while starring in a reality television show.

“The Grapes of Wrath”

Steinbeck’s horror classic about radioactive vines attacking in California’s wine country, and the brave surfers who fight them off. Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze star.

“Of Mice and Men”

An Aardman Claymation Production. A young mouse befriends a human family. Aardman’s Oscar, full of charm.

“For Whom the Bell Tolls”

Oliver Stone’s remake of his own “Sound of Music,” with an eye-opening Stephen Carrell.

“Three Faces of Eve”

Bette Davis headlines this devastating satire of Hollywood, introducing a radiant Marilyn Monroe and a cameo by a blood-curdling Joan Crawford as her mother.

“Little Women”

The fourth version of the Louisa May Alcott classic about four sisters (Bea Arthur, Betty White, Rue McClanahan and Estelle Getty) out to nab husbands, the better to produce an heir to save the family farm.